Sometimes the problem isn’t you.

As I was biking home from work today I realized that I didn’t have to stop once for a water break or a walk break. Thinking back to this time last year I was riding my $20 kijiji find bike that had broken gears and a chain that spent as much time off of the bike as it did on. I recently bought myself a brand new bike. It isn’t the prettiest bike, but it rides beautifully. I had been biking with a broken bike for so long I had forgotten just how easy biking can be. I don’t have to stop every five minutes to fix the chain, or take a break. I had gotten so used to my old rickety bike that I had started to believe that I was just really bad at biking. I mean, a 15 minute bike ride would take me 40 minutes.

As I reflected on my new found biking abilities I started to understand a lesson God has been slowly revealing to me: sometimes the problem isn’t you.

This school year has been a really trying year. I have had constant conflict with a set of parents from my class. From day one I have been questioned about everything including, why their child is sitting in a certain seat (we change seats every week), where their child’s possessions are (sometimes they have been in his hand), and even recently I was questioned on the outfit I was wearing. Even though I spend the majority of my life at school or prepping for school, nothing seems to be enough for their child. I have spent the year praying about it, stressing about it, having nightmares about it, but it wasn’t until today on my smooth bike ride that I understood it.

When you are constantly riding a broken bicycle, or going through a negative situation, you start believing you are the problem. Well sometimes you may be part of the problem, but in situations like these, let me tell you, you are not. No matter how good of a cyclist/teacher you are, you are not very effective of you are working with brokeness. Let’s pray for those whose brokeness leads to negativity, and let’s rejoice in knowing that even though our life isn’t always easy, it is always God filled, and it is certain it will become smoother.

“I will go before you and make the rough places smooth”

Isaiah 45:2

Welcome Back, Blog

After several months of vacation Humble Beginnings is back!

I have been enjoying so many beginnings that I haven't made time to write about them all. I promise you'll have the chance to read all about them soon enough, but until then, here is a list of what has been filling my bucket lately.

-Education Program at Acadia University
-Teaching grade 1
-A new relationship
-New books on my shelf
-A new job!
-Career fair
-Choir (the kind that wears robes)
-Beginning to take on less to accomplish more 
-New projects and art

and my personal favourite:
-new challenges and struggles. 

I am excited by how my first little blog post has turned into an entire adventure. 
I hope you have been embracing your beginnings, and looking for new ones!

I Give Up

"What about your hair?!?!" the girls cried as I sat down in a chair, preparing myself to be covered in slime.

"It's just hair" I said. (The thought of an icky, strange colored substance being in my hair hadn't even crossed my mind.)

Many of you know that I'm trying to grow my hair out to donate  it... it just happens that my hair grows slower than a snail working against gravity. If we're going to give our lives to Jesus, that means all of us, even the physical us. If getting covered in slime is going to make kids smile, and remember the ministry and encourage them to come back....then sign me up. If donating my hair means I can't dye it or chemically treat it, then so be it, and if donating blood means that I have to put on a few pounds... then I am game! I am willing to give up* whatever I can.

This week I took the time to fill out the paper work to become an organ donor. I gave up my organs, because I've already surrendered my heart. These donations seem like such small things to give for God, but I think (and hope) that someday my minor actions will be major blessings in the lives of others. 

Perhaps if we prayerfully work towards giving the physical self it may just be easier to start working on giving the deep stuff that tends to trouble our hearts.

I've added "Become an Organ Donor" to my bucket! 

*"Giving up" for me means presenting my physical self as an offering. Giving up, in the sense of losing, but also in the sense of surrendering, and offering things up to God. 

Catch My Drift?

Two weeks ago I bought a brand new kite. 

Tuesday I sat around and waited for wind. 

Wednesday I sat around waiting for wind.
Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and the next week....I waited for wind.

Yesterday mom woke me up with a "Annie it's SO nice out!"
Followed by a "still no wind though"

Two o'clock came around and I saw a leaf move, and then its friends joined in the dance, so I jumped in the car and raced to the park. (I clearly already had my kite in the car ready to go). 

That little bit of wind was all that I needed to see Lightening McQueen soar. 

I was reminded that sometimes we just have to catch a breeze and have faith it will take us where we need to go. Just when we think we're about to do a nose dive, the wind has a tendency to give a little more, providing we give a little slack too. It's up to us how far we want to put ourselves out there. There's a lot of string to work with, but we'll never reach new heights if we stay neatly tied on the ground. 

Here's to reaching new heights, going above and beyond what we consider to be the zones of our comfort, and having faith that with a little direction we'll end up just where we need to be. 

             "If you wait for perfect conditions, 

                             you will never get anything done." ~Ecclesiastes 11:4

                                                             

                                                         May you soar this week. 

A Perfect 10 (year old)

When I was young, I was fearless. Where did it go? Do we see more dangers as we grow older? Do we become more afraid of death the more we live? 

When I was younger I went on almost every ride at amusement parks, I picked up jelly fish, and I never saw death as a consequence to adventure. 

From the age of 11 to the age of 20 I was a pretty fearful individual. I saw death as a real possibility. Hiking to Memel Falls was terrifying, I rarely did anything without first researching it extensively, and I wasn't brave. 

But did you know that we are meant to be courageous? Yep! It's true. 

When I turned twenty I was tired of holding myself back, and missing out on things that looked so darn fun! That was the age I bought plane tickets and flew across the world all by myself. That was the age I started going on adventures in the wilderness of Fredericton. That was the age that I began to have no fear of death. With a great hope, and a future secure, there is nothing to fear. 

Saturday I was faced with one of those questions of "Am I too scared to do this?" and sadly my initial reaction was yes. You see, at the Canada Games Centre there are some pretty nice water slides, and as I  swam in the pool watching everyone else have fun, I knew I had to give one a try. The memory of Tidal Impact 2009 when I missed out on every water slide at Magic Mountain haunted me. I wasn't going to miss out on the much smaller scale water slides before me. Not this time! I had already driven past these water slides and wished to try them, and I didn't want to continue to drive by them living with missed opportunity hanging over my head. So when begged told encouraged by a ten year old,

     "PLEASE come with me!" (If only she knew I was thinking the same thing towards her)

     "You can do it, Annie!"  (If only she knew that's the voice I was trying to find in myself)

I accepted the challenge, but I also didn't hide my fear from her. It's important to be real with kids. She assured me I'd be fine as we climbed each and every step of the towering platform, and I may have muttered, "if I get hurt...." 

So how did I feel after the water slides? I felt such a sense of sense of accomplishment! And I also felt like I'd experienced the worst wedgie of my life. (Next time I'll stick with just the yellow slide). 

I truly realized how important it is to encourage others and for us to rely on one another...even if there is an age difference! 

If you find yourself holding back from adventure, cling to a ten year old. Kids are the bravest people I know. Don't be afraid to voice your fears! Try one thing that slightly scares you! Take small steps....all the way to the top. Don't over do it. I had the encouragement to try the diving board, but you know what? Two out of three isn't bad. So because of the wonderful ten year old I met, I am able to give myself a Perfect 10 for bravery!   

Photo from the Canada Games Centre Website. 

Be Strong and Courageous, 

do not be terrified or discouraged, 

because the Lord is with you where ever you go! 

-Deut 31:6

You Can't Always Get What You Want. Thank Goodness!

You know what I like? I like not getting what I want. 

I like not getting what I want, because there always seems to be something better lined up for me. I was reminded of this on Tuesday night as I headed to the church in my community to help build the new gym. I had been looking forward to this event for over a week, and had even prepared a special ensemble. They had put a call out for anyone with carpentry skills, a passion for carpentry, or people who just want to help. I was the third category. I showed up ready to hold boards, hammer nails, and maybe even use a saw. I didn't get what I wanted. I was wasn't fast enough when it came to hammering, I wasn't strong enough when it came to the moving, and more than anything I was in the way. I wandered over to see if the electrician needed help; he didn't. I walked away and sat on a pile of lumber thinking to myself, "this isn't what I expected at all!" Things started looking up as the electrician called me over to hold a spool of cable, then to pull it and weave it behind the stud beams. Before I knew it I was wiring the new gym! I even helped decide where the outlets should go! How cool is that? There were spaces that the cord needed to be pulled through that only my arm could fit. It would have been really easy for me to think that I was fired from the carpentry side of things, but when the head carpenter asked what I was doing on the other side of the gym I proudly told him that I had been promoted to electrician's apprentice. 

As I reflected on this experience it got me thinking of other times that I haven't gotten what I wanted....and instead got something better!!!

Last summer I was really hoping that a friend of mine would be hired at a very interesting job. When she didn't get the job I was quite disappointed and maybe even frustrated, but I later found out that if she had gotten the job she wouldn't have gotten a better job offer, and I wouldn't have had one of the best summers of my life. 

I also got thinking about a guy that I dated a few years ago, and how perfect I thought the relationship would be. It's funny how things don't always line up with how we idealize imagine them to be. Our imaginations are so limited! Just like my construction project, no matter how I constructed the scenario in my mind, there was something waiting that was far better than I could have ever imagined. We can think up the best person for us, or the best job for a friend, or even how a simple volunteer project should be, but more often than not, by not getting what we want we get something so great that we couldn't even imagine wanting!

I guess I'm just doing my best to remember that the best is yet to come, and to go with the flow, because getting what we need is far better than getting what we thought we wanted any day. 

"Sometimes not getting what you want is a brilliant stroke of luck." -Lorii Myers

Marked for Replacement

After one of my last days of school I was walking home from the bus stop and stumbled (quite literally) across this section of pavement. It got me thinking, "why do they have to mark it? Isn't it obvious that it needs replacing? Is it so that the public knows that it is being worked on?" I liked my newly found sidewalk message. It assures me that those in charge have seen that this brick needs caring for, and that soon it will all be better. 

A few days later I started doing some serious weight lifting at the gym. Now, three years ago when I started this whole gym endeavour I was lifting hand weights that weighed 2lbs. My progress has been quite successful as I am up to 15lb weights, and to my surprise I can bench press half of my body weight! As I started pushing myself to do more and more, my body started to make the changes the accommodate the weights I was lifting. I learned that inorder for muscles to grow, they must first break down; the fibers tear due to the pressure, so that they can be made stronger. Being broken is healthy! Being broken means that it is making way for something stronger, and better.  As you can see...my tricep muscle fibers have been marked for replacement.

Being marked for replacement doesn't always mean that we get a super cool looking bruise, some times it means we stumble...sometimes over large chunks of concrete. Sometimes we are broken, sometimes we are those big broken chunks of concrete. But these broken times just mean that we are being made stronger, and built for better things. We just have to remember that we are never given anything we can't handle, and that the best really is yet to come. How are you marked for replacement this week? 

Trendy

I always learn things from youth group. I know I'm not considered a "youth" anymore, but I'm a big believer in learning through everything. Tonight we were going over fitting in, opinions of others, and what scripture has to say about it. Francis Chan began to talk on a video and one of the first things he said is that "you should be happy when someone puts you down for following God". This whole idea of standing apart resinated with me as I recalled an event that happened a few weeks ago.

I had recently moved in with one of my best friends and I was at school one day enjoying some tea when all of a sudden the girls at the table beside me started talking quite loudly about my roommate. They were saying things such as, "he's just so lame", and "what a downer", and my personal favourite, "and he's all about no sex before marriage, I mean, what is that?!?" 

I was faced with the situation: what do I do? Do I butt in and refute what they had to say? Do I stay quiet and listen to everything? 

No, I didn't interrupt their conversation and pipe up. I could have, and I had the courage to, but it just didn't feel right. In this particular situation, I felt that the best way to show love to the girls, to my roommate and to myself was to hear what they had to say, chuckle to myself, and share the conversation as soon as I got home. My roommate was rather excited about this conversation, and I think I was too. The things that the world sees as lame are some of the top things that I love about my roommate. Staying away from drugs, waiting until marriage to have sex, and being in the world but not of the world are demonstrations of faith, and it is my roommate's faith that gives us such a strong bond, and more importantly it is what keeps a strong bond between him and God. It's laid out pretty clearly in the bible that we are blessed when people mock us, persecute us, lie about us, and say all sorts of evil things against us because we are followers of God. 

You might think it's lame, and the table of girls might think it's lame, but I think it's rather cool to have a friend who stands up for what he believes in, and welcomes blessings no matter how they may come. 

Just because something is trendy, doesn't mean it's truth. What's trendy today, may not be tomorrow. 

May you be encouraged, filled with courage to keep on the narrow path of truth, and to always stand up for what you believe in. It is my hope that you find a bit of joy when others call you a downer for being down with the gospel and what it has to say. Don't be afraid to stand up, and don't ever be afraid to stand out. 

Here's to choosing the narrow road. 

A Year of (a) Biblical Woman(wearing a)hood

Today was a really special day for me. Today I took the time to walk around downtown and wander into my favourite (two story) used-book store: The Owl's Nest. It was one of the first of the city's treasures that I discovered when I moved to Fredericton four years ago. The store has funny comics, interesting posters, countless creepy owls to watch you peruse their books, and the store is even home to a cat named Pepper; talk about character! Anyway, today was a special day, because while walking through the store I recalled the last time I made the same trail to the Christian Non-fiction section. Way back in November I had made a solo trip similar to today's and found myself staring at, what looked to be, with a few additions or subtractions, probably the same books. November's visit to the shop had me captivated, but interestingly enough it was not because of the shelves upon shelves of gold worthy stories waiting to be explored, but it was largely due to the story I was hearing. 

The radio was tuned in to CBC, yet another reason to be fascinated with this place, and an interview was airing about a new "Christian book" (I use the term so that you know what I mean, and I use the quotation marks because a book cannot decide to follow Jesus, and I have a pet peeve of things being declared 'sacred' or 'secular' and the like) by a Christian woman who decided to live a year of biblical womanhood. What really caught my attention was the fact that it was banned in most Christian bookstores, because it contained the word vagina. (Well there goes my hopes of this blog ever being promoted at one of the 5 bookstores in the city.) I thought that was rather crazy seeing as Christian women have the same anatomy as non-Christian women, and you know what, bookstore owners? That word you're banning had a part in your coming to be, just so you know. 

Any who, back to what's important. I was instantly filled with the "people should read it for themselves and discern if this book should be read. I should read that book!" I paid for a copy of Eugene Peterson's The Message (so that I have one to lend), and rushed home to google the CBC interview, and scramble to remember the author's name...err Rachel something. I decided I would read this book. So, schoolwork happened, months went by, and then I came across this author's blog. Right! I want to read that book. I ordered it through my university library's documentary delivery service...and a couple weeks later I caught news of the book from a library in NJ waiting for me. 

I couldn't put it down. Seriously. The past couple days have been nothing but book for me. Book in the sun, book on the bus, book walking downtown while people dodged me on my way to The Owl's Nest. You have got to read it. By the way have I mentioned that the book is called A Year of Biblical Womanhood by Rachel Held Evans? Yeah, you should probably know that. 

It's about a woman who looks at passages of scripture addressing or pertaining to women about lifestyle, dress, and everything in between. Each month she focuses on a different virtue of biblical womanhood: January was valor, April -purity, June -submission, etc. For 365 days she didn't cut her hair,  she devoted herself to the duties of the home, and dressed modestly. You might be thinking she's crazy, but it truly is good to subject ourselves to things like this (at the very least reading about them) so that we may be aware of what it meant/means to live a life of biblical womanhood, and so that we may decide for ourselves what is relevant today for our individual lives. 

What I liked best about the book was how everything was backed up with scripture, and it wasn't one of those flip and find kind of books it was a "I'm doing this, because in this verse it says ......". I liked that the book read like a story...err...a compilation of blog posts. Rachel was honest with what she struggled with, what she didn't want, and the times that she spent crying on the kitchen floor, because yes, it happens to the best of us. Not only does she dig deep about scripture directed towards women, but she also includes stories of women from the bible who can often be overlooked. 

I'm going to be honest...there was one thing I didn't like about the book, and it was through no fault of Rachel's; there were more than a few references to the consumption of guinea pigs. My little M&Ms (Mary and Martha) have such a special place in my heart that I some how managed to forget that in some countries my little girlies would be supper. I'm going to have to work on forgetting that. 

I left The Owl's Nest and came home to finish the last few pages of A Year of Biblical Womanhood that I was savouring. Just as this journey to and through Rachel's book began with my favourite bookstore, with that it ended. 

I feel as though I know Rachel. I'm pretty sure we'd be good friends. (She retweeted me, thanking me for reading the book, so that signifies friendship...right?) I felt as though I was right along side her throughout the steps of her journey. Many of the things she was thinking, I often think. Many of the things she struggles with, I struggle with, and her river of writing is quite similar to that of mine. A good author leaves readers feeling full, but a great author leaves readers overflowing. This is what I am, overflowing. I feel so encouraged to write, so excited to read, and so inspired to live,-live a life of biblical womanhood that is, a life of figuring out exactly what that means to me. 

In other news:  "Read A Year of Biblical Womanhood" is now in my bucket.  

You can buy the book is on sale for 12ish dollars and you can buy it here! 

Here are some great quotes from the book:

"We all wrestle with how to interpret and apply the Bible to our lives. We all go to the text looking for something and we all have a tendancy to find it. So the question we have to ask ourselves is this: Are we reading with the prejudice of love or are we reading with the prejudices of judgement and power, self-interest and greed? 

      If you are looking for Bible verses with which to support slavery, you will find them. If you are looking for verses with which to abolish slavery, you will find them....This is why there are times when the most instructive question to bring to the text is not, what does it say? but what am I looking for?" (296). 

"The apostles never meant for their letters to be interpreted and applied as law in the same way that the Torah had been, so careful readers must do the hard work of sorting through which instructions might continue to illuminate and guide the modern church, and which are more specific to the context..."(260).  In the same letter to Timothy that Paul writes about women not having authority over men, he also writes that 'men everywhere should pray, lifting holy hands..' (1 Timothy 2:8). There's all kinds of good stuff and historical context in this book about women and leadership in the church...which, incase you didn't know, I'm all for if they feel called by God. 

"Some rabbis say that, at birth, we are each tied to God with a string, and that every time we sin, the string breaks. To those who repent of their sins, especially in the days of Rosh Hashanah, God sends the angel Gabriel to make knots in the string, so that the humble and contrite are once again tied to God. Because each one of us fails, because we all lose our way on the path to righteousness from time to time, our strings are full of knots. So the person with many sins but a humble heart is closer to God" (303). -What a heart-warming way to look at repentance. 

"But according to Ahava, the woman described in Proverbs 31 is not some ideal that exists out there; she is present in each one of us when we do even the smallest things with valor" (90). 

"For Brother Lawerence, God's presence permeated everything- from the pots and pans in the kitchen sink to the water and soap that washed them. Every act of faithfulness in these small tasks communicated his love for God and desire to live in perpetual worship. 'It is enough for me to pick up a straw from the ground for the love of God,' he said" (29). 

"The apostle's elevation of singleness as the ideal stands in stark contrast to the modern Church's fixation on marriage and family. Singles were celebrated in the Church then, and should be now" (107-108). 

"In fact, it seems that most of the Bible's instructions regarding modesty find their context in warnings about materialism..(128). She earlier mentions that modesty is about so much more than clothing. A large part of it is presenting ourselves in a way that our inner self is allowed to shine through. It is a state of mind. It is order, self control, and simplicity. 

Enjoy Yourself

"Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think,

Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink.

The years go by, as quickly as a wink,

Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think."

These lyrics have been floating around in my mind as I come to terms with the big move that I'm about to have. It't not big because I have a lot of stuff, nor due to the distance. It is a big move, because it is going to cause a lot of change in my life.

Today I reminded myself that it really is later than I think.
My four years in Freddy are almost done!!!

So today I:

+ Used up the credit I had earned at the Christian bookstore. (Woo hoo!)

+ Submitted one of my last papers (Hallelujah!)

+ Enjoyed sitting in the gym waiting for my roommate.

+ Made friends with my building's plumber. (Shout out to Jack!)

+ Made friends with the lady who runs Tae Kwon Do at the gym. (Hey new Buddy: Barb!)

+ At a cheeseburger

+ Slept in until 7:30!

+ Stepped out on to the balcony and breathed in the fresh air.

+ Was incredibly patient as I waited 22 minutes at Value Village to pick up a gift certificate.

+ Used up the rest of my Photocopy card at the library (wont be needing that!)

+ Called one of my best friends.

+ Drove around Fredericton breathing in the blessings.

There are many things here that I am going to miss, but I would have missed more if I didn't take time to enjoy myself. Time for some exam prep, and paper writing!

Enjoy your day!

No EquiveLENT

The season of Lent has come and gone, and I've been reunited with my favourite food group. Let me tell you, after 46 days without almost all of my favourite foods, the meat that I tasted Easter morning was fantastic. My roommate woke up to the smell of maple bacon and to me sitting in the living room staring at my full plate of bacon. My weekend was filled with ham, bacon, turkey, AND a CHEESEBURGER! Oh glorious cheeseburgers. Just so you know...I have a bit of a passion for cheeseburgers....one of my professors even named my Cheeseburger Girl after the first week of class. There were almost tears in my eyes when my friend Ashley suggested we make burgers. I devoured my burger, and with the last bite in my mouth, I made room for the words, "this may be the Lent speaking, but that was the best burger I've ever tasted." 

So what were the 46 days like?

The first couple of weeks were quite difficult, not because of the withdrawal, but because of the limiting food options. My first night at my mom's house with no meat, she listed off foods that she had that I could eat...one being chicken noodle soup. My breakfast sandwiches had to become "fried egg sandwiches", stir frys had to become meatless, and eating out was near impossible. Instead of my usual "2 Cheeseburgers with just ketchup"...I was left with only fries. When my grandparents treated me to a meal at the Big Stop I realized just how unaccommodating menus are to vegetarians. EVERYTHING on the menu was made with meat...even all three of the soup options. I ended up ordering a chicken salad (without the chicken), but I enjoyed the cranberries and mandarine oranges that were added. My friends didn't make it easy for me...every time we shared a meal I was always offered meat. I can still remember the 20th day of Lent. I hadn't smelled bacon in 20 days and my roommate decided to make some. I had to physically go in my room and shut the door. These 46 days were very prayerful days. 

I was surprised to learn that other restaurants have hidden vegetarian options, such as Burger King. I enjoyed my first ever veggie burger while driving home to Nova Scotia one night. Swiss Chalet also delighted my taste buds with a fancy veggie burger. Food options at Sobeys pleasantly surprised me with delicious simulated Chicken nuggets, and "interesting" veggie ground beef. But none of this really matters...because even though all these vegetarian options contained the same amount of nutrients as meat and claimed to be the equiveLENT of eating meat... there is no substitute for the real thing. I relied on prayer for energy, which worked well, but I still ended up dropped quite a few pounds, which is not something I set out to do. After looking in the mirror after my large plate of bacon, I saw noticed that I had that just-eaten-meat glow. It didn't matter how many man made "meats" I tried...nothing was an adequate equiveLENT. Nothing ever compares to the real thing. I gained a lot of respect for vegetarians, but I gained a whole lot more insight into God's love...nothing will ever compare to the real thing. No matter where I turn to find joy, peace, and love...nothing will ever nourish me like God. 

There you have it. 

If God's love is kind of like a cheeseburger, then give me a burger and call me Cheeseburger Girl. 

Photo cred to my roommate who enjoyed this moment almost as much as me. 

Indeed

It has taken me twenty two years to BEGIN to realize what Easter is all about.

For me Easter used to be about:

+my family and I sharing a meal a my grandparents’ dinning room table.

+getting a small Easter surprise Easter morning.

+spending the morning with my church family.

+singing Easter hymns at Centreville Baptist

+a restful break in Nova Scotia.

+a time to dream of making Easter dresses for all of my future daughters.

+a day to match all the church ladies by wearing purple.

+listening to the Easter Cantata.

+seeing the white side of the choir sashes, opposed to the blue.

+waking up to my mom’s voice.

+remembering Easter egg hunts in the snow.

+dishing up dinner at 12pm.

+driving to church by myself.

This year Easter is quite literally about sacrifice.

+This year I don’t have any of the things that once reminded me of Easter. 

+This year I’m spending Easter with family, just not the family that I expected.

+This year I’m spending Easter with  brothers and sisters in Christ.

+Hiding Easter eggs filled with trail mix around the apartment.

+Having no specific time to cook a turkey.

+Driving to church with friends.

+Celebrating the end of the Lenten season with a big plate of bacon.

The past few holidays have been different for me. Mom and I have celebrated them early. Christmas and my birthday were celebrated almost a month before the rest of the world celebrated them. Easter and my mom’s “Big” birthday were celebrated a few days before the calendar told us to.

This Easter was about sacrifice.

My mom gave up her turkey, and the fixins,

She gave up time with me,

She gave up the small easter gifts she had set aside for me, to give to someone who needed them more. She gave up a few hours of her Saturday all so that I could be with a friend who needed me. I gave up all the things that Easter used to mean to me. Easter now means love, sacrifice, and presence. This Easter God used situatins in my life to show me one one millionth of what Easter is about, and what Jesus did. The world has such a way of twisting things, and it is so easy, even for Christians to get confused in the tangled web, but this Easter is different. This Easter is different indeed. This Easter is better. This Easter is better indeed. This Easter is about Jesus. This Easter is about Jesus indeed. Christ has risen. Christ has indeed. 

Christ is risen from the dead

Trampling over death by death

Come awake, come awake!

Come and rise up from the grave!

Pause

I graduate in less than a month. Pause.

I have a lot of school work to do. Pause.

I start my next degree in about a month. Pause.

Soon I will be moving provinces...again. Pause.

I have to finish this assignment, but tea and a kitty are more important. Pause.

I'm getting older. Pause.

Things are staring to skink in. 

Right now almost every aspect of my life feels like it is moving too fast. I feel like someone has the remote control of my life and is skipping through the channels, without letting me just sit down and watch one entire show. 

The reason why I haven't been blogging a lot lately is because I sit down, write half a post, and then never return to it. I have three essays started, but no motivation to take them any further. I have tentative plans with friends, but I haven't actually gotten around to seeing them. I'm having a really hard time soaking up where I am, and what I am doing. I feel like I'm in line at the grocery store and the person behind me is invading my personal space, pushing me almost in to the person infront of me. 

Monday afternoon/evening I hit Pause. My roommate and I were both in a weird mood, and long story short we ended up whipping out the Nintendo. We hit Pause on adulthood. In those few hours we didn't think of school work, graduation, or other concerns. It may have been a highlight of mine while here at STU. A highlight of STU that wasn't at STU at all. I know, crazy eh? Super Mario Bros. triumphed over most of the knowledge I gained, because Nintendo taught me the importance of pause. Our lives may not literally be like Nintendo, able to pause and pick up where we left off, but what I think we can do is pause certain aspects of our life. Homework is always going to be there. Worry about the future can wait, and most concerns of life can wait until a bit of time is invested into the life of Mario and Luigi. It's okay to admit that you "need a minute" (no matter how long a minute is to you). It's okay to say "no" to socializing and to say yes to an evening of crocheting, or Criminal Minds. In fact, I may go so far as to say it's healthy to hit pause once in a while, and gain rest for the journey. What I'm going to miss most about Fredericton is not the cool classes, the mad adventures, or the hustle and bustle. I'm going to miss the times I sat down and hit pause, reflecting on my time, and spending quality time with the people here that I love. Being busy can be a blessing. I find that it is in my busiest times that I appreciate my Pause button the most. 

My Phirst Fone

Cellular Phones. Ugh. 

One of my friends is on her 5th Cellphone.

One of my friends bought a brand new phone because it was blue, 

and then realized that the blue was really just a sticker. 

One of my friends left his phone on the bus and never saw it again.
One of my friends is forever complaining about her phone contract. 

You probably have a story too. 

Well last week was a rather gloomy one for me, 

as I said goodbye to, and reflected on My First Phone. 

I was 19 when I bought my first cell phone. I was the last of all of my friends and most of my peers. When it comes to technology I'm a late bloomer. With such a large university campus, in such a large city, and such a large number of friends (I had almost 40 contacts.. woah!), it became quite important for me to have a cellphone if I wanted to have relationships with new people. Lately my phone has been developing new features every week. First it decided to stop showing me who was sending me text messages, then it stopped saving messages to my outbox, and last week the speaker stopped working and I was unable to hear incoming calls. Features, not flaws. It added some mystery to my life. 

I caved. I went to the phone store and asked them for a non-fancy phone that was just like the one I was ready to retire. Would you believe that they ONLY have fancy touch screens or super basic flip phones? What happened to the phones with buttons? I like buttons. I like sewing buttons, big red buttons, and buttons on my phone. In fact the sales lady looked at my as if I had three heads when I told her I wanted a basic phone with simple features. I had to explain to her that I'm not a "phone person". 

Long story short, I bought the simplest phone that wasn't a bulky flip phone. It is, I regret to inform you, a touch screen, and apparently it is an "Android" which I think means it can use the internet? maybe? Anyway, it only stays charged for about a day, and it looks pretty fragile. It is also much more difficult to use, I even did the grownup thing and sat and read the ENTIRE user manual. The manual, for the record, did not come with the phone, you have to look them up on the internet now, but the good news is you can do it on your phone...if you KNOW HOW! For those of you who know me well, you know this is terrible news, as I lose my phone ALL THE TIME. Either the couch starts ringing, or the pillow buzzes, or I find it in the car a week later. 

My old phone lasted 4 years, stayed charged for a week, was petite, and never had a scratch (even though all it went through), and it properly texted all of my messages. My new phone is built not to last, stays charged for one day, is much bigger, has a thin screen, and often mistakes "I"s for "Os" and "K"s for "L"s. My old phone was so simple to use. For a so called SmartPhone this one isn't a very smart phone, it can't even open the lovely picture text messages my mother sends me of my guinea pigs without being on the internet. I just fail to see how this is progress. Sure my new phone looks prettier than my last, but that's about the only positive difference, and I don't really care about looks. Shouldn't phones be progressing to stay charged longer, to be sturdier, and for each letter to have it's own button? I guess this is just a reminder that newer, flashier, and fancier isn't always better. 

I'm sorry I'm so sour. I'm going to miss my old phone, but I guess an "upgrade" (if that's realllly what it is) is good once and a while.

Welcome, new phone :) 

Happy Birthday, Blog!

Today my Blog is one year old! It's hard to believe that what started as a few thoughts in my head has turned into such a fun and exciting experience!

It is interesting that:

~That my blog has had over 4000 views.

~That people in Canada, the United States, Russia, Germany, the United Kingdom, China, Romania, the Ukraine, Sweden, and Thailand have read what I thought was important to write.

~My most viewed post has been my "Assumptions" post. This is exciting, because it is a pretty recent one.

But these are not the things I'm celebrating. Today I'm celebrating the fact that I've stuck with this project for a whole year! I'm celebrating the fact that many people have gotten to know me a bit better, and I them, through my blog. I'm celebrating the fact that my writing skills have been improving because of this activity. I'm celebrating that my blog has positively influenced my life. It has given me the desire to reflect on even the small things in life. My blog has helped me to share advice, experiences, encouragement, and achievements. I'm celebrating the several times I've gotten bitten by the blog inspiration bug and have had to run and get paper or open up a new note on my phone.  I'm celebrating the late nights that my blog and I have spent together, carefully weeding out words, and perfecting pictures. Today I'm celebrating the variety of viewers I have. The first compliment pertaining to my blog that I had was in the locker room of the fitness center, and the second one I received was from a friend at my Wesleyan church. Since then, it has been a great conversation piece at church, at the mall, and even over the internet. I'd like to share a quote I found not too long ago. Although about art, I think it pertains to blogging. "Don't think about making art. Let everyone else decide if it's good or bad, whether they like it or hate it. While they are deciding, make even more art." -Andy Warhol.

I'd like to share the fact that my blogs are just the random thoughts and observations that happen to run through my head like the breeze through an Eolian harp. I share them so that you are less likely to make the same mistakes that I make, and so that you may just learn a little something about me, or more importantly, a little bit about life.

Happy Birthday, Blog!  

You've come a long way since your humble beginning.

Class of 2014

IT'S OFFICIAL!

I am part of the Acadia University 16 month Elementary Stream of the Bachelor of Education Programme for 2013-2014.

What does this mean?

This means I will be:

~moving back home to live with my mom after my exams are through in April.

~looking into buying a car

~able to go to my home church every Sunday!

~saving a bunch of money.

~starting school a mere ten days after graduation, and will continue school until August 2014.

~doing my practicums at schools in the Annapolis Valley Regional School Board.

~gaining new pen pals.

~following God's plan for my life.

~looking for a job.

~missing some wonderful friends.

~back to where I started.

~happy.

I sent one of my best friends a message on the day I accepted the offer of admissions.

I said, "Morning, friend. I just wanted to let you know I have made an oficial decision for schooling next year. It may come as a disappointment, but not a surprise that I'll be going to ACADIA!!!!"

The response I received was exactly the confirmation I needed to hear. "I will miss you, however, I am confident that the choice you made was the correct one. Congrats annie!!"

I know it was the right decision. I'm blessed and appreciative of my time at St. Thomas University, and I am equally excited and enthused to be a student at Acadia University.

Acadia has been so wonderful to me. They have sent me countless e-mails reminding me to apply, they met with me last year at this time to help me choose courses for the fourth year at STU, they answered all of my questions, and called me on a Friday night to inform me of my acceptance. They invited me to an informative open house last Wednesday, and forced encouraged me to get to know my future classmates. They empowered me, making me realize just how important and influential teachers can be, and encouraged me by saying that there is in fact employment opportunities for teachers in Nova Scotia. They made every part of the application process important, and they looked upon each one of us as gold into which they were ready to invest time and knowledge. I wont merely be getting an Education degree, I will be getting educated, and equipped to educate.

Motivation Makes a Masterpiece

I don't think that practice can ever make something "perfect", but I am a big believer that motivation matters. No matter what I'm doing I know that the reason I'm doing it is important. This has become evident in my life in the past 4 years and especially in the previous four months.

I have given four solid attempts in my life to learn how to crochet. It's difficult! I could never get the hang of it, but you know that moment in a classroom when a lightbulb finally lights up over the head of a student and the student gets it? Well that was me in November. My friend Rebecca showed me the basics of crocheting, and I got it. I "got" it enough to get by, I made countless little, tiny hearts, and then I made many little monsters, and eventually I tried my hand at making a bunny. It wasn't until I started giving away my projects and started making things with people in mind that my little skill started to take off. I started being able to look at a pattern and understand every stitch, and eventually I was able to start creating my own patterns.

My first project beside my most recent project. 

I had a similar experience with music. I never used to have an adequate singing voice, and my piano and guitar skills were...(prepare for a music pun) minor at best. As I started using my "super powers" for good, instead of evil (or selfish reasons) I started noticing a change. I opened myself up to being a member of my church's worship team. The more I shared the gifts I had been given, and the more I exercised them and helped build them up in others, the more strength I had behind my skills.

I hid my gifts, and what good are gifts if they're not given? You wouldn't make and wrap gifts for others and store them in your closet forever, so why is it we sometimes do this with spiritual gifts? For me, bravery was a big part of it. I was so scared that I wasn't good enough. The truth is...I wasn't good enough, but with God behind it, and with love as my motivation, my skills became more than good enough.

This week I encourage you to recognize and reflect on your super powers and to think about just how you can use them for good.

P.S. Don't tell the ladies, but I've got a bunch of pin cushions to donate to the annual quilt show!

Two-Oh-One-Two in Review

2012 was my FAVOURITE year so far, but I say that about every year that passes.

My First Day of 2012 was spent in Church leading a Children's Story about putting God FIRST in our lives. It was the first day, of the first week, of the first month of the year. It was the first day to put God first in our lives for 2012.

There were many firsts in 2012.
In 2012 for the first time I:

Made a clock
Drove on PEI
Helped take a bunch of teens to the United States.
Met the former Newsboys: Phil Joel & Peter Furler->
Won a radio contest
Learned to Crochet
Ate free samples at Costco
Witnessed my good friends Laura Lyons, Emily, Joy, and others graduate.
Visited 6 different Countries in one year (Canada, USA, Switzerland, Germany, France, and the Czech Republic)
Travelled by myself
Moved out of my first apartment
Left the continent
Went to a friend's wedding in Fredericton-------------------------->
Tried biking to work
Biked to work
Organized a church Worship Team
Tried Alcohol
Slept in the same room as a reptile bigger than my arm.
Took a university level Biology course
Started a phone and an internet contract
Wrote devotionals for youth group events
Saw movies such as "The Help," "Mirror Mirror," "The Hobbit," and "Taken 2" in theatre.
Witnessed my friends Erin, Liz, and Dan go through the waters of baptism
Won a t-shirt in a draw at a presentation
Ran in an organized race
Helped to plan and lead a youth retreat
Bought a boat (an inflatable one, but still!)
Went to Grand Manan ---------------------------------->
Sewed my own pair of footie pyjamas
Asked a professor for a reference letter
Drove a standard (not well, mind you)
Learned to play the ukulele 
Went for coffee with someone I didn't know
Had my friends Amanda, Melissa, and Emily over for supper
Started a blog!
Picked out and purchased eyewear all by myself
Adopted two ADORABLE pigs
Restored an old piece of furniture
Took a university level Calculus course ------------------------>
Had something done at a tattoo shop
Ate a homemade peanut buttercup
Browsed AND shopped at IKEA
Completed every course offered by Msgr Henneberry
Read a Harry Potter book for a university class
Drove to church in Fredericton
Gave my best "Children's Stories"
Was part of a group Halloween costume--------------->

And most importantly...

I kept a "New Year's Resolution" for the ENTIRE YEAR. That's right folks, I read about 4 chapters of the bible every single day of 2012, and all but a few of those days have journal entries.

My Last Day of of 2012 was spent in the Czech Republic, walking around Prague watching spontaneous shows of fireworks, and sleeping in a car at a well-lit rest stop. I couldn't have asked for a better year.